When a "Yes" Means a YES!

Loitering around the metro I heard this...

"I take one step away...but I find myself coming back to you...my one and only one and only you."

It was the song playing when I came in...

of course...during the recessional of the wedding I just chanced upon. Probably, the song is a pick of the couple.

Definitely one of my favourites as well. Thanks to my highschool classmate who introduced me to the song by playing along with a guitar.

I sat on the seat near the entrance to feel the ambience--for a while and to watch these busy people: enjoying, smiling, and posing. Wearing my natural keenness I heard a comment of people chatting around. "They really deserve each other." Which made me mull over this kind of celebration and I guess far beyond.

Walking down the isle. Settling. What view does people have about it and I for an instance. "Do you deserve each other?", well and good as a question. But let me start by asking 'Are you ready enough to take a new phase?'

People would say no one is ready enough no matter how much you prepare. Well, I do not bow to such thinking. It would always take a "ready" person to take a challenge. You couldn't get a good fight if you won't be handling a weapon in a battlefield or a gloves on in a ring fight. Preps matter a lot...it is more of knowing what you can do and keep you going in a long run. So that you won't just say, "I give up" instead, you'd utter "Let's keep it up."

We usually hear people say that "Hindi yan kanin na pagsinubo mo at napaso ka ay iluluwa mo" (bahala kayong magtranslate!--ako pa ba?) So true! It won't stop on the day of the wedding. When saying a "yes" it must really mean YES. Opening a wider door for acceptance, adaptation, reconciliation, and commitment.--which can all be strengthen by communication.

Wedding takes a lot of preparation amounting to time, effort, and finances. But there's far more than that...

Pre-tense. (Coining a term here) It must not be just a Romeo and Juliet love story but your own.
How you started builds the foundation of what you can have as one for the future. Some had it via long term engagement while others have it in a shorter span. Well it works differently to each and every couple but remember it has to be firmly plotted in a God-centered way.

As per the time you were boyfriend & girlfriend, honestly you cannot completely reveal who you really are as skin-and-bones nonetheless by the time you are already living in one roof. But this shouldn't hinder you from taking the baby-steps to learn about you and your betterhalf. It can either be learning by doing things with them, by acquiring what they value, or simply by knowing them little by little on your own way.

Try to get to know each other better. Start being a good friend to each other, care more and communicate always.

Time is a vital part of it. If you won't devout time you cannot communicate and share details of you with each other. Some people won't be buying you with their time. If they have ample time they would give it to you as long as you need it but they won't insist. At a certain point, person can always determine if the person loves them by how much time they are willing to invest for one another.

Also, you have to be stable so you won't stumble; hold your horse if not. Stable that whenever you stumble you would always find a way to bounce back to gain the equilibrium. Know that you have to be emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially equipped. Let's all be practical. Don't be a burden to your biological family and to the family you are about to build. Above all, to the society you are in. Magastos magpakasal, manganak, at magpamilya but everything will be worth it.

Giving it a time would let you know a person better. By the use of "time" you can be "ready" on taking the next level.

So lady, you can pick up that white dress then, gentleman you may do the honour to put that wedding ring on...

In-tense. I wanna smash out the fantasy castle built atop of a mountain or nearby seashore.
Let's live in reality. Nothing is made perfect in this world as we are living in an alluring world.

Accept the fact that one can be busy at things or by work engagements. Keep in mind that you have loved the person as a whole and not just by part. If they tend to be busy-as-a-bee just let them feel you can always be their oasis of life. Never demand a thing they can't give at the moment because wanting more can lead to exhaustion on both ends.-the provider and the receiver. Have a good timing. Prioritise talks and not fights. Remember that the person is worthy of a warm embrace or a sweet kiss than a cold hit or a sharp word.

Accept the challenge, keep your defenses, and maintain the balance for your goal. Have a small goal each day don't create a list of enormous expectations.

Be the one...who pays attention to details in a positive way. Find time see what is not there and fill it with love. Never let the two of you feel abandoned. As you are there for each other to build and not to obliterate. At times you have to bend but do not break cos that's too different things. Bend to endure the test of time and go beyond your limit and gain new learning about how you can win the challenges together. You are not meant to break and injure the one you promised to love.

Post-tense. Set a "Forever" of yours. Look for a happiness which can make your better half wear a wide smile on their face and carry it by heart.
Give some unexpected gifts, nice surprises, and little compliments.
-A kiss of good morning and a good night
-A compliment for a new hair do
-A good hug and rub on the back after a tiring day
-A whisper of thank you, I love you, take care, God bless.

Simple gestures of tender love and care:
-A simple message or text of sweet nothings like the old days.
-A run or walk at the park for just an hour.
-A play of dual sports of your choice
-A shared reading of a news journal or a book
-A drive somewhere away from the usual
-A morning toast and a share of political and life views
-A joke to make them smile. (Any knock,knock or banat)--you possibly can't be that old not to know this
Well, these were just suggestions. You can surely think of something better.

There you are thinking that you had everything, then figured out there goes much to give. Remember to take one step away but two steps closer to your one and only. Nothing should stop loving and commitment it must go on and on and on.



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Ping!

Ping! That would be the sound familiar to anyone. The sound that would wake you even you are sleepy. You are correct! --it is the sound of an alert once you receive a message either via messenger, chat, or email.

What's the reason of mentioning it? Oh well, don't you think that this sound actually moves you to respond immediately or be motivated to look or check the message? As a matter-of -factly it urges you to act onto something.

I have known someone who actually has this effect on me. I should say that I really admire this person. Largely,  affecting me postively. I want you to get familiar of him even just with his story.

He seems to be so vulnerable, young, and free. He takes life lightly even if life actually offers him the reverse... I mean it. He has no perfect  home--it is not about a grandeur house to live in but having no mom to look for the whole family---broken it can be.

No grandeur house would be fine. A shelther would be alright. So let's leave it that way. He doesn't have a mom because of a "choice". He once opened up the thing but I didn't bother him much of going deeper. This caused the family to be less connected...taking life individually but he's different. YES, he helped himself to become individually equipped but for the benefit of the family. He uses his craft to be less of a burden. He has been working for his family which eventually lead him to stop schooling. He said he has to stop but would surely pursue it soon. I know he'd find a way. He took the role of being a provider beneficial to keep his family intact.

Truly no broken home can't be rebuild. In little sacrificial way you can lead a completeness by accepting the role and keeping the goal.

Then, why shouldn't we (with complete family members) give strong bond with our own?

Talking about family, he also created family among his friends. He maintain to cherish and to respect people of any age. He may had been bullied and could have possibly been sidelined most of the time but he managed to hold his horse over talk-of-the-mouth of people around. I know he's really hurt as people would look at him negatively each and every day. Sometimes, even some of his friends does the bullying. Friends can be real cruel that's true so he would just smile and accept being called-out but I know inside he's crying.

Inevitably you have to stand courageously over matters at hand so you won't be dragged down by inferiority. Know that defeat is most of the time self-made. You can cry to release some of the tensions but fight with a joyful heart so they'd know that you love yourself more than they love their own.

Loving should start from us and show people nothing but love as love begets love.

At one point, he once confessed that he has this feeling for a girl. This girl gives her an intense feeling which he says "love". I must agree that he has a feelings for this girl, yes, he definitely like her. This girl is a close friend for years and years. He usually joins activities for her, attends something for her, finds time to see her, and totally thinks of her good.--name it. But this girl just made him feel he's not good enough. She never had a feeling for him. So settled being a good friend though he's in pain.

I have to zip my mouth about this. You can infer.

For all the adversities, he remained so pure.  Despite of the negativities, he remained calm and kept his faith with him. He never ceased to pray to God and share Godly verses whenever he has load.

Truly, this person is not just somebody to me. Cos I am learning through him. I really appreciate how he is taking life his way. He is someone who's worthy of grace.

What I learned from him is that life is like music it can give you different melodies...well surely, you'd soon find a way to sing your heart out to it and blend with it perfectly.

Let me share the bright side...

This man,  is trying to live life completely. He still works for the family through his talent,skills, and perseverance. He currently received a sponsorship to study from where he works.

The one being bullied before gained bunches of brothers and sisters who looks up to him although it is not known much to him. He has been designated task for multitude of people (kids on Sunday Catechism back then) that when he would pass by... they would call up to him with a "hi", all-teeth smile, and high-five. He's somewhat a celebrity.

And now, he is in love with a beautiful -kindhearted lady he met in the church. They had been exchanging sweet nothings continuously even if the girl is away because of studies. [But brother, be sure to take it slow okay? Just be inspired,  be motivated, enjoy the "ding"! Everything in His time.]

By the way, thanks for being an inspiration to write this piece.

Thanks for letting me know that when you dream,  dream wide awake. Life mustn't be fooled around but must be played right and enjoyed well.

Walang daluyong na dapat kang ikahon kung sisikapin mong tumindig at magtiwala sa nasa itaas.

I hope you have learned this "ping!" ;-)

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