When a "Yes" Means a YES!

Loitering around the metro I heard this...

"I take one step away...but I find myself coming back to you...my one and only one and only you."

It was the song playing when I came in...

of course...during the recessional of the wedding I just chanced upon. Probably, the song is a pick of the couple.

Definitely one of my favourites as well. Thanks to my highschool classmate who introduced me to the song by playing along with a guitar.

I sat on the seat near the entrance to feel the ambience--for a while and to watch these busy people: enjoying, smiling, and posing. Wearing my natural keenness I heard a comment of people chatting around. "They really deserve each other." Which made me mull over this kind of celebration and I guess far beyond.

Walking down the isle. Settling. What view does people have about it and I for an instance. "Do you deserve each other?", well and good as a question. But let me start by asking 'Are you ready enough to take a new phase?'

People would say no one is ready enough no matter how much you prepare. Well, I do not bow to such thinking. It would always take a "ready" person to take a challenge. You couldn't get a good fight if you won't be handling a weapon in a battlefield or a gloves on in a ring fight. Preps matter a lot...it is more of knowing what you can do and keep you going in a long run. So that you won't just say, "I give up" instead, you'd utter "Let's keep it up."

We usually hear people say that "Hindi yan kanin na pagsinubo mo at napaso ka ay iluluwa mo" (bahala kayong magtranslate!--ako pa ba?) So true! It won't stop on the day of the wedding. When saying a "yes" it must really mean YES. Opening a wider door for acceptance, adaptation, reconciliation, and commitment.--which can all be strengthen by communication.

Wedding takes a lot of preparation amounting to time, effort, and finances. But there's far more than that...

Pre-tense. (Coining a term here) It must not be just a Romeo and Juliet love story but your own.
How you started builds the foundation of what you can have as one for the future. Some had it via long term engagement while others have it in a shorter span. Well it works differently to each and every couple but remember it has to be firmly plotted in a God-centered way.

As per the time you were boyfriend & girlfriend, honestly you cannot completely reveal who you really are as skin-and-bones nonetheless by the time you are already living in one roof. But this shouldn't hinder you from taking the baby-steps to learn about you and your betterhalf. It can either be learning by doing things with them, by acquiring what they value, or simply by knowing them little by little on your own way.

Try to get to know each other better. Start being a good friend to each other, care more and communicate always.

Time is a vital part of it. If you won't devout time you cannot communicate and share details of you with each other. Some people won't be buying you with their time. If they have ample time they would give it to you as long as you need it but they won't insist. At a certain point, person can always determine if the person loves them by how much time they are willing to invest for one another.

Also, you have to be stable so you won't stumble; hold your horse if not. Stable that whenever you stumble you would always find a way to bounce back to gain the equilibrium. Know that you have to be emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially equipped. Let's all be practical. Don't be a burden to your biological family and to the family you are about to build. Above all, to the society you are in. Magastos magpakasal, manganak, at magpamilya but everything will be worth it.

Giving it a time would let you know a person better. By the use of "time" you can be "ready" on taking the next level.

So lady, you can pick up that white dress then, gentleman you may do the honour to put that wedding ring on...

In-tense. I wanna smash out the fantasy castle built atop of a mountain or nearby seashore.
Let's live in reality. Nothing is made perfect in this world as we are living in an alluring world.

Accept the fact that one can be busy at things or by work engagements. Keep in mind that you have loved the person as a whole and not just by part. If they tend to be busy-as-a-bee just let them feel you can always be their oasis of life. Never demand a thing they can't give at the moment because wanting more can lead to exhaustion on both ends.-the provider and the receiver. Have a good timing. Prioritise talks and not fights. Remember that the person is worthy of a warm embrace or a sweet kiss than a cold hit or a sharp word.

Accept the challenge, keep your defenses, and maintain the balance for your goal. Have a small goal each day don't create a list of enormous expectations.

Be the one...who pays attention to details in a positive way. Find time see what is not there and fill it with love. Never let the two of you feel abandoned. As you are there for each other to build and not to obliterate. At times you have to bend but do not break cos that's too different things. Bend to endure the test of time and go beyond your limit and gain new learning about how you can win the challenges together. You are not meant to break and injure the one you promised to love.

Post-tense. Set a "Forever" of yours. Look for a happiness which can make your better half wear a wide smile on their face and carry it by heart.
Give some unexpected gifts, nice surprises, and little compliments.
-A kiss of good morning and a good night
-A compliment for a new hair do
-A good hug and rub on the back after a tiring day
-A whisper of thank you, I love you, take care, God bless.

Simple gestures of tender love and care:
-A simple message or text of sweet nothings like the old days.
-A run or walk at the park for just an hour.
-A play of dual sports of your choice
-A shared reading of a news journal or a book
-A drive somewhere away from the usual
-A morning toast and a share of political and life views
-A joke to make them smile. (Any knock,knock or banat)--you possibly can't be that old not to know this
Well, these were just suggestions. You can surely think of something better.

There you are thinking that you had everything, then figured out there goes much to give. Remember to take one step away but two steps closer to your one and only. Nothing should stop loving and commitment it must go on and on and on.



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